~just a feeling~

~true nv~

hey

been very long since ive posted

been what they call it

busy

haha

yeah todays post is special

its gonna reveal what i fear

besides height that is

haha

well here goes

ans these qns

am i ur fren

am i a gd fren

am i boring

am i someone u can rely on

am i someone u can depend for help

if i am for at least one

am i gd enough for u

gd enough to accompany u

gd enough that u will not make me feel left out

coz i cant bare to feel that im not doin what u expect of me

thats why im depressed more often now

if u realise that is

i try to mask it

but no promises

tell me if im not gd enough

dont question me if im secretive

thats why i dont feel u trust me enough to help u

and i expect u to help me

so there

end

~MAI~

~mid killer course~

~true nv~

well as u guys might or rather should noe

the mid course is here n will end soon

yes but why do i feel stress now

is it because i didnt do what i thought i could and would

darn

hate tis feeling

well raya is here for three more weeks

yes after mc can celebrate fully without any afterthoughts

i would like to take this opportunity to ask for ur forgiveness

if i had done anything that hurt u whether directly or not

please forgive me

i will forgive if u do

hopefully we both forgive each other

thx

end

~MAI should i~

~the night we ruled the world~

~true nv~

if u guys didnt noe

me and halim went on air

on the 25th sept

on ria fm

coolness

it was fun yet i was nervous

now the whole world noes

haha

i tried to sing

too soft i guess

darn

haha

but i got too be a dj for a day

cool

get to hear my voice on air

though its not nice

haha

halim was great

gd dj voice

we were baku

haha

cool

haha

will remember tat day

when we ruled the world

~still empty~

~might be too late but i'm happy i woke up~

~true nv~

hey
for all of u who have been constantly reading my blog
thx
been a while since i put up post of my own
n not lyrics
though it has meanings

haha
now lets get to it
i got a wake up call from my friend
like juz woke up from coma awake
no offence intended
but ya

however it seemed that my efforts have been futile
sad
but i think it is for the best
im not funny
im not smart
im not brave
im not religious
im not me

well to tell u the truth
i have tried to be someone else
someone who i thought i was but now im not
so guess wad
im now a changing man
haha

true
im not lying
but i hope my friends able to accept
what im going to do
what im sacrificing for
its for ur own good

i noe its sad
i don wanna lose my friends
probably will
but it is something i must try to do
for myself
for once

im sorry
especially to me
for betraying myself
lying to myself
hurting myself

if only i have someone to talk to now
in the past i did
now no more
maybe its my fault
probably is

but i really need someone now
to hug her
to tell i love her
but why all end up in friendship
its sad
its pathetic

well i guess its juz me
well i noe life is unfair
to me n everyone
but is it too much to ask
for someone to love me in return

this is deep
but i wanna noe
rejection is not pretty
nor is it fun
sigh

haha
why am i sad
i donno
its pathetic of me
but i cant help it
sad

but i will change as i said before
so watch out ppl
its an all out war

~wonder what will fill this space~

~sorry~

~true nv~

I know you think that I shouldn't still love you 
I'll tell you that 
But if I didn't say it 
Well, I'd still have felt it 
Where's the sense in that? 

I promise I'm not trying to make your life harder 
Or return to where we were 

Well I will go down with this ship 
And I won't put my hands up and surrender 
There will be no white flag above my door 
I'm in love and always will be 

I know I left too much mess 
And destruction to come back again 
And I caused but nothing but trouble 
I understand if you can't talk to me again 
And if you live by the rules of "It's over" 
Then I'm sure that that makes sense 

Well I will go down with this ship 
And I won't put my hands up and surrender 
There will be no white flag above my door 

I'm in love and always will be 

And when we meet 
As I'm sure we will 
All that was then 
Will be there still 
I'll let it pass 
And hold my tongue 
And you will think 
That I've moved on 

Well I will go down with this ship 
And I won't put my hands up and surrender 
There will be no white flag above my door 
I'm in love and always will be 

~MAI~

~metronome~

~true nv~

hey

moving through a transition from formal to informal

i'm sick

got cough and running nose

sigh

econs is dreadful

but i think i can do it

no i must be determined to do it

haha

gear one shifted

gear two attained

gear three tried

i guess gear four is just too much

cool

haha

that is MINE

repeat that over and over again

MINE MINE MINE

ending off

~MAI~

~a moment of silence, a lifetime of memories~

~true nv~

hello

today i will be taking a rather formal tone

lets remember who we have lost

and take our time to cherish who we still have

*moment of silence*

...

...

...

...

...

thank you

lets pray that our love ones are safe and healthy

remember that nothing is forever

and forever is ignorance

live life not because that you are forced to

live life because you want to and have the privilege to do so

i shall end this post with a short phrase

'no matter how hard and long the journey is,

it can disappear in an instant if you let it be a memory' 

~MAI~